body emulation
  • place: Kiel, Germany

31::March::1998 15:32 → permalink

Sleep comes slowly, my right neck and shoulder are contorted by muscular contraction, internal stress mapping. From traveling, although the travel yesterday went totally smooth. And the situation here in Kiel seems to be absolutely optimal. And even the weather is pleasant. Where to take this text (raw self-consciousness is a worn-out policy). No skills available like Henry Miller had, no raucous sex and rampant depravity to denote. Appreciable way of going, and writing, yes, but as something to emulate, I ain’t got the writing skills. Exactly what are skills in writing? Organizing thoughts, ordered presentation of information, logical arguments, reasonable dialogues, uh, accurate pictures inscribed by words, (mind-states precisely mediated by language), descriptive flashes of brilliance, insight, comic diversion, poetry, what the hell is poetry? Can’t remember the last time I wrote a funny story, although I do tell such things frequently. Oh shit, orbiting egos and oscillating senses. Too much mind energy spent in communications with individuals. I need forays into mass communications. To grind down the specificity at which (where is the body?), well, weariness sets in. Boredom. As a state of bodily function.

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